"Tie"m Bomb

This Cold War relic was designed in secrecy at an undisclosed location in South Dakota just like the Minuteman I nuclear intercontinental ballistic missile silo that it sits atop. Without a label, we will never know the true origin of this 100% silk masterpiece.

The Circle of Life

This vintage Geoffrey Beene 100% slate tie went full circle today when we photographed it at the same quarry where it was mined almost 30 years ago. The striations of the tie still perfectly line up with the stone from which it once lay.

Danger Tie

Are you afraid of heights? Afraid of living on the edge? If so, then this Geoffrey Beene 100% silk tie is the solution to all of your problems. Sporting a Native American tribal pattern this tie will bring out the warrior instinct in you.  With that said... JUMP!!!

Skidmarks!!! The Good Kind

 

This week I am taking Tieoneoff on the road to the exclusive vacation destination of South Dakota. I know luxurious ties and rugged South Dakota normally don't mesh however this Erreuno 100% Italian silk tie fit in perfectly. The crisscross alternating pattern of red bars and tiedyed horribleness resembled the skidmarks from my mountain bike which I made during a torturous 50 mile ride along the George S. Mickelson trail from Deadwood to Hill City.

SPF 100% Silk

The sun was blazing today and so was this beach bum's dream tie by Geoffrey Beene.  Made from 100% silk and covered with blue skies and beaming suns people just couldn't resist relaxing and catching some rays under the ties warm glow. 

Nice Ties Finish Last

To celebrate the official first day of summer I spoiled myself with the rare luxury of wearing a fashionable tie from my seemingly limitless unfashionable tie wardrobe.  The Calvin Klein Collection 100% silk tie with an alternating grey and blue square pattern would have been great accessory to wear to my place of work on a normal day.  Unfortunately, I chose to wear the tie on the hottest day of the year and my sweaty mess of a dress shirt totally negated any style points I got from the tie.

"Tie"ny Dancer

 Today's Metropolitan View all silk tie threw me for a loop.  Did the stylish geometric pattern resemble the scales of a reptilian creature or the cell structures of amoebas?   Answer:  Neither

The true beauty of this tie is only seen when modeled by another one of our office mascots Mr. Seal.  Though not as much of a rockstar as the real Seal (who was probably popular when this tie was designed), Mr. Seal does a pretty good job at jamming on his axe adorned with this fretboard resembling tie.

Hunger Games

Have you ever gotten to work only to realize that you forgot to bring your lunch?  Well that happened to me today.  Ironically, I wore a hunger inducing Series 417 tie by Van Heusen adorned with a stylish cornucopia of fruit-like objects.  Not only did I have to spend the day fighting through hunger pains coursing through my empty stomach, every time I looked down I was mocked by delectable images hanging from my neck. 

Happy Fathers Day!!!!

In an effort to better organize and display my impressive collection of ties, I decided to install an 8 foot decorative curtain rod on the wall of my apartment. To my dismay, about half way through placing the ties on the rod, a chain reaction tievalanche occurred causing about 150 ties to plummet to the floor.

Mar"Tie"ni Shaken, Not Stirred

Today we decided to class up the place  with a vintage striped skinny tie by the famed designer Christian Dior.  Created from a luxurious combination of 80% polyester and 20% silk this tie impresses onlookers with a style and class like the famed James Bond

Tie R L

Today was my first brush with fame!!! I had my first fan request and in true TRL Carson Daly style I fulfilled my fans dreams by donning a purple Fierte S.R.L 100% silk tie.  The classy chain-link fence patterned tie perfectly complimented the rugged yet dignified black work boots and accompanying Staten Island Hat of my handsome model.  Keep the requests coming people ....

Mis"tie" Clouds Hide the Skyline

Some days I even impress myself.  Not only does today's 417 Series by Van Heusen tie coordinate perfectly with our model's shirt.  Its "whimsical", "dreamy" and "cloudlike" pattern compliment the overcast skies that are cloaking the NY skyline today.  On days like these, one quote always manages to stick with me "A cloudy day is no match for a sunny disposition".

The Tie Stands Alone

Today was a sad and lonely day for this iridescent burgundy, green, and teal Editions by Van Heusen 100% polyester tie. Not only could I not find a muse willing to model this classic neck appurtenant but I was inundated with comments such as "it looks like you got sick at a wine tasting".  In the end, I chose this handsome bowling pin to show off the ugly ducking of a tie because the last time this tie was probably stylish bowling was actually a popular "sport".

BEWARE OF THE YE"TIE"

Behold the first photographic evidence EVER of the elusive and mysterious Governors Island Ye"tie"!  The creature was spotted lurking in the bushes of the Island's historic district donning her ceremonial Geoffrey Beene 100% silk headgarb,  (it's really a tie but she's a little slow so we humor her and call it a headgarb). This truly unique tie consists of alternating rows of geometric circles and stripes that come together to form a design that hasn't been stylish since 1988.  

Hipster Inspired

This red, oversize patterned, 417 Series tie by Van Heusen that was described to resemble "broccoli on acid" and "ugly elf shoes" left me a bit uninspired.  I sat down today in my thinking chair, defeated.  Then, out of the blue, I was contacted by a good friend and author of this organic food blog and was invited to dinner. After work, I hopped on the L train and entered a different world, one that I had never seen before, a place where it is Halloween everyday, Williamsburg.  Soon my normally out of place retro tie fit in perfectly with its surroundings and made me realize that no matter how ugly my ties are, hipsters still dress worse than I do.

Can't Steal This One Yogi The Bear!!!

What is more American than having a picnic on warm summer afternoon? Answer: Having a picnic on a vintage 90's super-wide ,GANT 100% silk, tie made right here in the good ole' U.S.A.  Though many people commented that they were mesmerized by mysterious images they saw in this Magic Eye Tie (coincidentally also a relic from the 90's), I saw it as a true multitasker.  Not only did it look great wrapped around my neck, its large surface area allowed for it to double as a picnic place-mat.

GERONIMO!!!!!

Today was a bit of a stressful day at the office, good thing I was artfully accessorized with this 417 Series by Van Heusen which was hand made from imported silk. Upon sitting down at my desk this morning, I was inundated with compliments ranging from "that tie is horrid" to "that tie looks like Indian Warrior paint".  Since the first comment was fairly discouraging, I took the second comment to heart and ran with it.  I found an arrow and proceeded to let out some of my stress on an unsuspecting co-worker.

The ORIGINAL Man The Myth The Legend

Who better to don a vintage Oakton Ltd. tie circa (date still to be determined carbon dating ongoing) than the man who we can thank for supplying this blog with a seemingly unlimited amount of ties, my father.  This classic skinny tie constructed of 90% polyester and 10% silk is the real deal and was the talk of the retirement party last night.  A true Mullet of a tie: grey, blue and red paisley business on the front, and a vibrant purple party on the back.